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“What am I doing wrong ” Jasmine Wilson thought to herself as she heavily breathed. Her breathing could be heard from nearby but was drowned out by the firm steps of several pairs of feet hitting the ground, each desperately pushing forward to get to the finishing line before the other. It was her first track meet, and she had almost given up midway through the race.
She didn’t know why she had decided to choose track and field as an after-school activity. As she tried to think of a reason why she had chosen to do a sport that requires a lot of hard training instead of something easier, she assumed that she had simply wanted to try it out.
Track practice was much harder than she had expected and very exhausting. At least, that’s what it felt like to her. When she observed her teammates, they seemed to run effortlessly. She wanted to be like them, but it was difficult.
“Ms. Wilson, do you have a goal in mind ” Betty Jones, the coach of the track team asked Jasmine one day after practice. “I just want you to think about that. What are you running for Who are you running for What will you get out of this experience, and how will that help your overall goal These are questions that you really need to consider, Ms. Wilson.” The older woman placed a hand on Jasmine’s shoulder with a firm look. “You don’t have to answer me right now, but I look forward to hearing your answers.”
At the race, small beads of sweat ran down the sides of Jasmine’s flushed face and dripped onto the faded letters of the high school track team’s uniform, which was close to her skin. Jasmine could barely focus on the present moment because her heart was pounding too loud in her ears.
Then she heard someone ask, “Wilson! Ms. Wilson, are you all right ” The familiar voice brought her come back to her senses.
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When she looked up, it was the coach of their team, Betty Jones.
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Jasmine took a deep breath and suddenly felt full of energy.
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文章大意
賈斯敏 威爾遜參加首次田徑比賽，過程中她呼吸沉重，幾乎在中途放棄。她回想起自己當初不知為何選擇了需要大量艱苦訓練的田徑作為課外活動，訓練比她預想中艱難，隊友們卻看似輕松。教練貝蒂 瓊斯曾詢問她跑步的目標，讓她思考為誰跑、能從經歷中獲得什么等問題。比賽時，賈斯敏汗流浹背，心跳聲震耳，幾乎無法集中注意力，這時教練的聲音將她拉回現實。
故事山分析
開端：賈斯敏參加首次田徑比賽，在比賽中倍感艱難，幾乎放棄，同時回憶起選擇田徑活動的初衷以及艱苦的訓練過程。
發展：教練貝蒂 瓊斯詢問賈斯敏關于跑步目標的一系列問題，促使她思考。
高潮（續寫部分）：教練在比賽中出現，鼓勵賈斯敏，賈斯敏重新振作，充滿能量，全力沖向終點，這是故事的高潮部分，展現了賈斯敏的轉變。
結局：賈斯敏完成比賽，通過這次經歷，她明白了堅持和明確目標的重要性，實現了自我成長，完成了故事的升華。
伏筆以及在續寫中的回應
伏筆：賈斯敏在比賽中艱難，幾乎放棄?；貞航叹毜某霈F鼓勵她，讓她重新振作，繼續比賽。
伏筆：教練之前詢問賈斯敏關于跑步目標的問題。回應：在續寫中，教練再次提及這些問題，引導賈斯敏思考，促使她找到繼續比賽的動力。
伏筆：賈斯敏對選擇田徑活動感到困惑，訓練艱難?；貞涸诮洑v比賽中的困難后，通過教練的引導，她對自己的選擇有了新的認識，克服了內心的困惑。
伏筆：賈斯敏看到隊友們跑步輕松，自己卻艱難。回應：在教練的鼓勵下，她不再與隊友比較，專注自身，全力沖刺，體現了她心態的轉變。
伏筆：賈斯敏在比賽中幾乎無法集中注意力?；貞航叹毜穆曇魧⑺噩F實，幫助她重新集中精力，投入比賽。
續寫要點
第一段：教練貝蒂 瓊斯出現后，關切地詢問賈斯敏狀況，接著引導她回想之前提出的關于跑步目標的問題，鼓勵她不要放棄，告訴她只要堅持就能實現目標。賈斯敏聽著教練的話，內心開始動搖，重新審視自己。
第二段：賈斯敏深吸一口氣，受到教練話語的鼓舞，充滿能量。她想起自己選擇田徑的初心，明確了目標，不再在意他人，全力朝著終點沖刺。最終她完成比賽，雖然可能沒有取得優異名次，但她從這次經歷中收獲了成長，明白了堅持和明確目標的重要性。
情感線
起初，賈斯敏在比賽中因艱難而感到絕望，幾乎要放棄，對自己選擇田徑活動充滿困惑。教練出現后，她從迷茫中開始重新思考，在教練的鼓勵下，內心燃起希望。當她深吸一口氣充滿能量時，堅定了信念，全力沖刺，完成比賽后，她為自己的堅持感到自豪，對自己的選擇有了新的認知，完成了從絕望到堅定，再到成長的情感轉變。
故事線
賈斯敏參加首次田徑比賽，比賽中艱難幾乎放棄，回憶起選擇田徑活動及艱苦訓練。
教練曾詢問賈斯敏關于跑步目標的問題。
比賽中教練貝蒂 瓊斯出現，關切詢問賈斯敏并引導她思考目標。
賈斯敏受到鼓舞，深吸一口氣充滿能量。
賈斯敏全力沖刺，完成比賽。
賈斯敏通過這次經歷收獲成長，明白堅持和明確目標的重要性。
主旨升華句
This experience taught Jasmine that as long as we hold firm to our goals and never give up, we can overcome any difficulties in our path. 這次經歷讓賈斯敏明白，只要我們堅守目標，永不放棄，就能克服前進道路上的任何困難。
Just like Jasmine in the track meet, in life, we may face numerous challenges, but it's our determination and clear goals that will lead us to success. 就像賈斯敏在田徑比賽中一樣，在生活中，我們可能會面臨無數挑戰，但正是我們的決心和明確的目標將引領我們走向成功。
Jasmine's story shows that the journey of finding our purpose and persevering through hardships is what truly shapes us and helps us grow. 賈斯敏的故事表明，尋找目標并在艱難中堅持的過程才真正塑造了我們，幫助我們成長。
Through this track meet, Jasmine learned that the key to achieving our dreams lies not only in hard work but also in having a clear sense of purpose and the courage to keep going. 通過這次田徑比賽，賈斯敏明白，實現夢想的關鍵不僅在于努力，還在于有明確的目標感和堅持下去的勇氣。
This event in Jasmine's life serves as a reminder that every challenge is an opportunity for self - discovery and growth, and with the right mindset, we can turn any setback into a stepping - stone to success. 賈斯敏生活中的這件事提醒我們，每一個挑戰都是自我發現和成長的機會，只要有正確的心態，我們就能把任何挫折變成通往成功的墊腳石。
寫作示范一
When she looked up, it was the coach of their team, Betty Jones. “Ms. Wilson, are you okay ” Coach Jones asked with concern. “Remember those questions I asked you What are you running for This is your chance to prove to yourself. Don't give up now. You have the potential to finish this race strong.” Jasmine listened intently, her eyes fixed on the coach. The words echoed in her mind, making her realize that she had been running for her own growth and self - improvement.
Jasmine took a deep breath and suddenly felt full of energy. She thought about her initial decision to join the track team, which was to challenge herself. With a new - found determination, she started running again. She ignored the tiredness in her legs and the heavy breathing. She focused on the finish line. As she crossed it, she felt a sense of accomplishment. Although she might not have won the race, she had overcome her own doubts and weakness. This experience taught her the importance of perseverance and having a clear goal.
寫作示范二
When she looked up, it was the coach of their team, Betty Jones. “Jasmine, you've come so far. Don't let this moment break you,” Coach Jones said firmly. “Think about who you are running for. You're not just running for this race; you're running for your future self. The hard work you've put in during practice is not in vain. You can do it.” These words hit home for Jasmine. She had been running for her own betterment, to become a stronger person both physically and mentally.
Jasmine took a deep breath and suddenly felt full of energy. She remembered the countless hours of training and the initial excitement of joining the track team. With a burst of speed, she pushed forward. She no longer cared about what others thought or how fast her teammates were. She was running her own race. As she crossed the finish line, she felt a sense of pride. This track meet was not just about winning; it was about learning to face challenges and never giving up on her goals.
【答案】When she looked up, it was the coach of their team, Berry Jones. It was then that Jasmine twitched her mouth with tears and sweat on her face and told her that, she couldn’t move an inch. No sooner had she uttered the last syllable than Betty gently stroked her head. “Do you still remember the questions that I asked you the other day ” Betty encouraged her, adding, “Confronted with tiredness, you are supposed to beat yourself with determination as well as persistence, which should be your ultimate goal of running.” With her words echoing in her ears, Jasmine plucked up courage to give it a try, determined and motivated!
Jasmine took a deep breath and suddenly felt full of energy. Puffing and panting, she dragged her legs with all her strength, moving towards the finish line. With her heart thumping furiously and pulse racing, she dashed as swiftly as she could in the last 50 meters. Instantly she reached the finish line, and thunderous applause erupted. Betty embraced her in a big hug. It was then that Jasmine shed tears of joy mingled with appreciation. Had it not been for the case, she wouldn’t have realized the goal that she was running for — It was beating herself with steely will and determination.

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